Some people think that detachment sentences
us to emotion-less living.
Actually, the cause of an emotionally
barren existence is not detachment, but the worldview underlying that
detachment. Some worldviews such as impersonalist or nihilistic consider all
emotions as unhealthy and undesirable. Those adhering to such worldviews build
walls around their hearts to prevent themselves from feeling anything, thereby
seeking an existence devoid of emotions.
However, the bhakti worldview that the
Bhagavad-gita espouses doesn’t reject emotions per se – it rejects misdirected
emotions, emotions that mislead, degrade and entangle. Bhakti urges us to
cultivate detachment from such emotions.
Detachment within the bhakti worldview is
the foundation for emotional intelligence. We all are subject to emotions
arising from our past conditionings. But if we learn to cultivate higher
spiritual emotions, then we won’t be sabotaged by lower selfish emotions.
Emotional intelligence means knowing where
to invest our emotions so that we can experience happiness and growth. For such
emotional intelligence, detachment is foundational – it enables us to step away
from relations, situations and even emotions that are harmful for us. Without
detachment, we stay stuck in self-defeating behavioral patterns.
The Bhagavad-gita urges detachment from
family members and yet the Mahabharata, of which the Gita is a part, reflects
family relationships at multiple levels. Its student Arjuna does grieve when he
loses his son – and the Mahabharata doesn’t depict that grief and the
underlying relationship negatively. But it does reflect the negativity, indeed,
atrocity and the calamity resulting from the attachment of the blind king
Dhritarashtra for his evil son Duryodhana. If that king had detachment, he
would have been able to take dharmic decisions.
Living as we do in a culture that entraps
us with a variety of attachments, we can empower ourselves with detachment and
act with emotional intelligence.
No comments:
Post a Comment